4 Weeks

She is the most beautiful baby girl. Happy 4 weeks Eddison!

It has been 4 weeks since Eddison came into our lives. It has been a very quick 4 weeks. There are times I look at her and think she needs to slow down. She does. She holds her head up, she grabs, she rolls to her side. What is next?

Today has been a harder day than normal. I haven't been feeling momtastic - mainly because of the dog. Grizzly dug the flower bed and the rock path... Then got into the house, covered in mud, and wouldn't go back outside. That was my good morning. That was the moment I decided I need to focus on the good.

The good is - I am at home with my daughter. I am teaching her the basics of life, I am teaching her to be a good, spiritual woman. Those are things, if I were working, someone else would be responsible to teach her.

I am so blessed to be her mother. I need to take the time and really focus on that and not let the day get me down.

There are only 4.5 weeks left for me to be at home with her, then I go back to work. I know that day will be one of the hardest in our momma/daughter relationship. I thank God we were able to find someone so close, and we were able to have this much time together. I pray God allows the transition to be easier than I anticipate. I pray that she enjoys her time, that she still develops the way I know she will. Yet, in the back of my mind all I want to do is be with her. I want a break - I admit that. But, that is a break for ten minutes.

Check out those love rolls! I love her squishes.

I don't want to break from being her mom. I just want to take a nap, or just enjoy a coffee outside... I want to be able to focus. There is not one thing to focus on, but I feel like I am torn between so many things. I want to focus my 100% attention on either her. However, I am focusing on a 100 other things all at once and I feel like I am neglecting her. I am sorry for that. With that I will go take my Eddison in my arms and give her kisses.